Sunday 12 April 2020

Today, on Squirrel News

All squirrels! All day! Which, let's face it, is considerably more upbeat than regular human news at the moment.

Hot and heavy action at the Squirrelmatic 3000. Out of three squirrels, two have assessed the new situation, and through some trial and error, are now accessing peanuts on demand. Or, you know when we put a few out in the morning. We're not Santa. 

The third squirrel, well. This squirrel has spent literally ages trying to lift up the lid he is standing on. We have seen him jump down on the platform and actually lift the lid, but then jump up and resume fighting physics. This squirrel is obsessed with the feeder and will chase the other squirrels away - so he's stupid AND aggressive. He has now resorted to trying to chew his way through. He is an idiot. He could almost be human.

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