Sunday 31 July 2011

the quiet before...

it's sunday morning, 730 am. humph is snoozing on the sofa - he will begin his "time for my 8 oclock walk" routine in about 20 minutes. this involves oversized stretches, dramatic yawns, meaningful stares in the direction of the door, and eventually a full on choral accompaniment of whining. this all turns into miraculous, scampering, whimpering joy when we put our shoes on. if i am not putting on my shoes, and look like i will stay at the table drinking coffee, humph will come and stare at me from about 6 inches away, and if that fails, will actually prod me with his (cold, wet) nose. he has an unerring knack of finding that strip of skin between the waistband of my jeans and my t-shirt. it certainly gets your attention. he's right of course, the walks are lovely and the perfect way to start a day.

but this is all ahead. right now, we relax in a sunday morning ocean of calm (and coffee).

Sunday 24 July 2011

cognitive thinking - not so good

poor humph. n has taken out the rubbish, putting up the gate to keep humph from accompanying.

barred and trapped. oh the pathos, the cruelty, the whining.


but say humph, what's that to your right?

could that be a gap, do you suppose? could you be released from your unholy prison to take your right and proper place at your master's side?

perhaps it is too narrow?



no, not too narrow, but it IS on the scary scary floor - the bit with no life-saving, floor mat lily pads. and there, humph will not go. unless he forgets, which he does often, happily prancing back and forth, all four paws on the dreaded lino, until - something twigs deep in the recesses of his doggy brain, he looks down, and *whoosh*, scampers for safety.

one of these days he will figure it out and we will have to become considerably more conscientious with our behavioral controls.

until then, we do have a laugh, i'm afraid. poor old humph.

Sunday 17 July 2011

bed transcendence

i will not be held back by your arbitrary definitions of bed...

Saturday 16 July 2011

home alone*

*does the dog count?

i have a very unusual, luscious evening all to myself tonight. it's not often i get time here alone anymore, so when i do it's a bit of a treat. i am guessing that this is a treat that would wear off quickly and this post should in no way be read as tempting fate, but - you know - once in a while - it is nice.

i am listening to the tUnE-yArDs album, WHOKILL, and i'm enjoying it immensely. i read a review of it on a blog this morning, went onto spotify, and am now listening to the album. just like that. amazing.

n is playing a wedding this evening - a country-western themed lesbian wedding. they have a bull ride, a hog roast, and, apparently, more stetsons than you could shake a stick at. he was really looking forward to it -and you have to admit, it sounds like fun. were i the marrying type, that's the sort of thing i would go for. fingers crossed that it's all going well.

(if i were the marrying type, i'd skip everything but the entertainment and hire richard cheese and a great well stocked bar with bartender and we would all dance into oblivion to cheesy versions of so-called pop culture and even though i would still spend the same as those "this is the most wonderful day of my life" freaks we would have way. more. fun.)

when i told my mom about my evening of solitude (*) on our weekly phone call (we live far away but keep up remarkably - were we to live in the same country we would not converse with anything like this frequency. odd, no?), she laughed and said i'd probably be asleep in half an hour.

she's so misguided. it'll be at least 45 minutes.

Thursday 14 July 2011

Sunday 3 July 2011

(not so) tidy

grapecat: hey - did you put the tool box away?
n: yeah - i thought you were done with it
grapecat (archly): no - of course not - if i were finished with it, i would have put it away!
n: (slight pause followed by hysterical laughter)