top tip

so if you top up your mobile phone twice in quick succession, say because vodafone seems to think you could actually spend a pound of phone credit between topping up and buying their incredibly mis-named "freedom-freebie" package, thus necessitating you to groan, go through the topping up again, realise you can't top up by less than five pounds even though you are only a pound short, and then do so through gritted teeth, then your undoubtedly well-meaning bank will put a flag on your debit card. it will send you cryptic, slightly spooky automated phone messages to tell you this, which your partner will just assume is spam and erase and you will have no idea that this has happened until you are standing in the local pharmacy, trying to pay for a prescription for eye antibiotics, while the cashier phones the number flagged on her machine, and, through mounting mutual embarrassment, proceeds to ask increasingly personal questions prompted by a voice that puts her on hold for what seems like hours, while you completely freak out that you have been hacked and all of your (nonexistent) life savings are gone gone gone. not to mention that seven people also waiting in the pharmacy now know how much you pay in rent and when your gas debit is collected etc etc.

so don't do that.

bloody vodafone.